Proof that mothers really do carry the family’s mental load
From knowing which after-school activity falls on which day to when the household bills are due, making sure family life runs smoothly is never simple.
Now a study has revealed that mothers overwhelmingly carry a family’s “mental load” while fathers often take a back seat.
This strain, also known as “cognitive household labour”, refers to the thinking work needed to keep family life running smoothly – including planning, scheduling and organising tasks.
Conducted in the US, the study found that mothers take on 71 per cent of all household mental load tasks, ranging from planning meals and arranging activities to managing household finances.
Analysis of responses from 3,000 parents also found that fathers are more likely to see mental labour as equally shared, while mothers disagree.
Dr Ana Catalano Weeks, one of the study authors from the University of Bath, said: “This kind of work is often unseen, but it matters. It can lead to stress, burnout and even impact women’s careers. In many cases, resentment can build, creating strain between couples.
“We hope our research sparks conversations about sharing the mental load more fairly – something that benefits everyone.”
Other examples of “mental load” tasks include keeping track of washing towels and sheets, throwing away children’s clothes that no longer fit, planning birthday parties, scheduling dentist appointments, noticing when children’s nails need to be cut, remembering when a boiler needs servicing, coordinating play dates and throwing out food.
The study, published in the Journal Of Marriage And Family, also revealed that mums take on 79 per cent of daily jobs such as cleaning and childcare while dads tend to focus on episodic tasks such as home repairs.
A recent study also showed that working mothers are twice as likely as fathers to consider reducing their hours or leaving their jobs because of parental responsibilities.
“Going forward, the challenge for governments and employers who care about attracting the top talent is how to create policies that are supportive of both mothers and fathers sharing the unpaid work at home,” Dr Catalano Weeks added.
“One policy that comes to mind is well-paid, gender-neutral parental leave – which both the UK and US are way behind on compared to the rest of Europe.”
Researchers said they would encourage families to plan and work together to make every day more balanced.
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